A Credo, of Sorts

I've gotten a lot more patient and tolerant as I've gotten older, especially over the last few years (years of weirdness, they've been), but I've become much less patient and tolerant at the same time. I'm more patient with children . I'm more tolerant of messes. At work, I'm more patient with the annoyances that come with retail (oh, right, I'm back in retail; that'll be another blog later on). I'm more tolerant of waiting (most of the time). There are things that aren't worth freaking out about anymore.

Now, let's address the ways in which I am less patient and tolerant. Let's.

Liars.
I HATE being lied to. I will not tolerate it. I won't even try to justify it or blow it off. I really dislike liars and want to eliminate them from my life. Given a choice, I'd much rather deal with someone who is a little TOO honest than with someone who lies to "make me feel better." Just give it to me straight. Finding out I've been lied to is one of the worst feelings, and I've determined not to lie to people. I'll be careful with my phrasing and choice of words, but I won't lie. Liars are cowards.

Manipulators.
I also hate being manipulated. I was in a serious relationship that was in the first stages of manipulation and emotional abuse when he dumped me. It took me a LONG time to recover from that few months, and it took me a long time to realize that he'd started to become manipulative and emotionally abusive. When I say that particular breakup got worse before it got better, that's what I mean--the realization that I'd let myself be manipulated and emotionally abused was a kick in the gut, and I'm still angry at myself for not standing my ground with him. People who manipulate and emotionally abuse others because they get off on the power are disgusting. Absolutely disgusting. Worthless little worm-eaten trolls. People who double down because their former victims are finally standing up for themselves are disgusting. It makes me physically ill (and mentally violent) when I find out people I love are being manipulated and emotionally abused by worthless little worm-eaten trolls. I also find it really pathetic when these worthless little worm-eaten trolls stamp their feet and pound their fists in feeble attempts to regain the control they've already lost. Manipulators and abusers are cowards.


Rudeness.
Grow up already. Being rude for the sake of it doesn't solve anything, and it makes you look stupid. Servers and cashiers make fun of you when you're gone, FYI. So do your office mates. So do your classmates. Making rude remarks about someone's appearance makes you a jerk, especially if it's virtually or physically to his or her face. Guess what, buddy--fat people know they're fat. They don't need you to point it out. Being rude doesn't make you funny or more popular. It makes you pathetic and small-minded.

Most of all, I hate hypocrites.
If all you can post on Facebook are inspirational quotes about how to be a good person, but your actions are the complete opposite, you are a hypocrite. Your actions match your intentions, whether you are consciously making it happen or not. Eventually, people will see through the little pity party you throw yourself every time something happens that doesn't line up with your rosy little view of the fantasy you live in. Eventually, your actions won't be smoothed over with a glib one-liner from Zig Ziglar. Eventually, you will slip up. It's just a whole lot easier to be honest with yourself and everyone around you, and deal with your shortcomings in a healthy way.

So, basically, don't lie to, manipulate, be rude to, or pretend with people. They'll figure it out. It's not worth it. I've ended friendships because of these things; I won't stand for them. The older I get, the less likely I am to stand for them. I'd rather be single than marry a jerk. I'd rather have fewer friends than let myself get pushed around. I'd rather be "difficult to work with" instead of participate in a lie.

I'd rather have people dislike me for standing up for myself and others than be a coward.